Doing art

That was me making art when I was in 1st or 2nd grade. Look at the determination on my face!

I wish I could always move forward with the confidence I had as a kid. Before all the self doubt and criticism began to accumulate and sink its nasty claws in good and deep.

I was surprised the other day to hear my favorite musical artist talking about how he lacked confidence for so long. How he still had such a long way to go and had better get his shit together and start learning these things. I was stunned. He was giving an interview while being inducted into the Rock and Roll hall of fame.

My rock GOD. My beloved Trent, who I have told my husband I would leave him for if Mr Reznor were to propose. LMAO…

He doesn’t think of himself as I do. Or as millions of other fans do. So in light of all that, perhaps there is hope for me. I wonder if any artist ever truly believes they are “enough.” Or if we all spend tortured hours wondering if our art is original enough or as good as our peers, etc etc.

They say, “Comparison is the thief if joy,” but it’s hard to be objective when you’re working solely with subjective things. One person may look at my stuff and see something special, while another may laugh at my amateurish attempts and suggest I’d be of better use teaching finger painting to toddlers.

Confidence or no, for now I just keep making stuff and putting it out there. Bad, good or other, at least the one thing I don’t have to second guess myself on is whether I pushed past my comfort zone and tried.


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